Enough with 'fiction'al outrage!

Maggie says, still annoyed after not having time to write about this last week when it was news:

You know, I'm really not sure what bothers me more: a party with its head buried so deep in the sand that it simply doesn't understand how outraged, depressed, and frustrated Americans are with this administration's policies at home and in Iraq, or that party's sputtering indignation over the fictional writing of Democratic candidates because of some sex-related passages.

As we've all heard by now, Virginia Republican Sen. George Allen accused his Democratic opponent Jim Webb of “dehumanizing men, women, and even children” through his fiction. Webb, a Vietnam veteran, is the author of six novels, most of which have military storylines. Implicit in Allen’s charge is the accusation that Webb spent his writing career demeaning women and writing about sex rather than uplifting humanity through glorious prose. And of course, that it’s impossible to write about sex and uplift humanity at the same time.

A few things backfired for good ‘ol George Allen last week, though:

1. Virginia voters are more concerned about real issues than fictional ones: The weekend poll shows Jim Webb ahead of George Allen even after his pathetic smear attempt.

2. Seeing a pattern here? Apparently Virginia voters are also more concerned about words out of real men’s mouths – like the racist ones George Allen himself is known to have used – rather than what fictional characters might say in make-believe stories.

3. Oops! Not everyone thinks Jim Webb dehumanizes men, women, and children: Turns out the so-called “obscene” Fields of Fire is on the United States Marine Corps-sponsored reading list!

4. Glass house alert: When your party’s “Second Lady” has lesbian affairs in her own literary closet (not that she’ll openly acknowledge her real-life lesbian daughter’s open door), Republican hopefuls might want to watch what they say. Seeing Lynne Cheney squirm (I'm not a fan, as you might remember) last week was priceless.

You know, what we’re really seeing with these low-ball politics is absolute arrogance at play. Republicans are still operating on the outdated strategies of old: go for below-the-belt character attacks (that coincidentally almost always involve actual below-the-belt parts, which we're not supposed to admit that we have, I suppose) to get the “values voters” out in droves, and you’re guaranteed to win.

The problem is, this year the real values in question are a little more important than erotic fictional scenes. They involve an unjust war, now-record U.S. military deaths, massive civilian deaths, big-money corruption, dinner-table struggles in the face of record corporate profits, and a morally bankrupt power center controlling this country and destroying our role in the global community. American voters get this; half of the folks running for office just don’t.

Talking about novels at a time like this seems a little shameless, doesn’t it?

Not to mention desperate.