Mikaela says:
All these designated months. What good do they do? Aren't they really a slap in the face, a weak form of pacification, some half-assed apology that things aren't better, but at least we're thinking about you?
Lest we take it for granted how far we've come, maybe it's good to remember and be thankful that at least we have the recognition that we warrant a month. We've fought hard for what we have.
There's still a long way to go.
The ACLU put together a wonderful slide show on women's history and a page on women's rights.
I'm struggling these days with what it means to be a woman in relationship. Not easy. Still not easy. I haven't had to make the compromises and sacrifices that many women make. I've chosen not to have children until I can have a partner who will raise them with me, but there's a ticking clock, and I've promised myself I'll do it alone -- partner or no partner -- by 36 because motherhood means that much to me.
In the meantime, I struggle in each of my relationships to ask for what I want and need, to ask as much of a man as I give, to remember I'm worthy of love and care, too. As a woman, I value care-taking; I'm good at it. As a woman, I often forget to allow space for someone to take care of me. Afraid of being disappointed, it alwasys seems easier to just do it yourself.
Real strength, I tell myself, is keeping yourself open all the time, knowing you can pick up the pieces even when your heart shatters. Friends will be there to help you gather the shards. I strive to live as though making myself as beautiful as stained glass -- broken and sealed into art and beauty.
In honor of women's month, a poem by June Jordan, one of my favorites, who always has so much to say that all of us need to learn.
The Talking Back of Miss Valentine Jones: Poem # one | |
by June Jordan | |
well I wanted to braid my hair | |
From Naming Our Destiny: New and Selected Poems by June Jordan, published by Thunder's Mouth Press. Copyright © 1989 June Jordan. Used with permission. |
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