Mikaela says:
For those m-pyre readers who are not m-pyrical readers, we're closing down the shadow twin -- or maybe the brighter, sunnier side -- of m-pyre.
I've been trying to bring myself to write the kind of sassy, sometime mindless tripe I used to throw onto m-pyrical when it just didn't seem up to m-pyre standards.
But it's time, and this month for me is all about consolidating forces and riding the wave of energy when it comes, so ... here goes.
My admission: Not only am I a rabid Bush-watcher, I'm also obsessed with Britney Spears.
Not the good Britney or star Britney but the vacuous-yet-endlessly-fascinating-because-she's-vacuous-yet-famous Britney. How can anyone so dumb still be a national obsession? She's the madonna turned whore turned madonna turned whore, and we're still with her every tortured step of the way.
I would feel worse for her if she made even the slightest effort to redeem herself and make better choices. Or if she were to make a single choice based not on herself and seemingly bottomless taste for hedonism at any cost.
So she lost her kids to her not-so-much-smarter but at least less destructive former husband, the would-be-forgettable-except-he's-Britney's-ex-and-somehow-in-comparison-smarter and better choice for a father K.Fed. K.Fed.? Yes. Kevin Federline.
Oof.
But as always, The Onion sums it up perfectly in its "opinion poll":
- "Isn't there another relative or perhaps a perfect stranger the kids could live with?"
- "God, I hope there's some high-stakes poker game Federline could lose them in."
- "At least now she'll have time to do more drugs and have more kids."
And yes, I'm dreadfully ashamed of myself, especially when respect-worthy people write really good reasons to give up our destructive addiction to national news and focus on actually understanding our local communities.
Maybe if Marty had papparazi?
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